Archive for February, 2010

Thoughts on Forgiveness

Sunday, February 21st, 2010

This week is best said by those who said it best.  Lara

Mother Teresa’s Anyway Poem

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;

It was never between you and them anyway.
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“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
-  Mahatma Gandhi
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“Compassion, forgiveness, these are the real, ultimate sources of power for peace and success in life.”
-  The Dalai Lama
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“Reconciliation is to understand both sides; to go to one side and describe the suffering being endured by the other side, and then go to the other side and describe the suffering being endured by the first side.”
-  Thich Nhat Hanh

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Have we lost the BETTER in “Bigger, Better, Higher, Stronger, Faster?”

Sunday, February 14th, 2010


I love the Olympics. I have since I was a kid.  I believe in the dream that there are some things that can transcend our political differences and bring people together.  The Olympics and Para Olympics hold that promise.  Each country sends their athletically best to an arena where everyone knows and abides by the rules.  It is exciting to see the best of the best push themselves to be just a bit more.

But unfortunately, in the Olympic games of the present, competition is not just amongst the athletes.  There is another game being played out on a different level; an administrative level, with committees, countries and federations.  Canada spent over $22 million on the “Own the Podium 2010” campaign.  This was to push the idea that Canada would walk away with the most gold and other medals.

Although they mention ‘excellence’, it is very clear that the goal is to ‘win more medals than anyone else’.  More = Better.  Really?   But Canada is not alone.  They are riding the wave of ‘bigger and faster and more’ is better.  Every Olympics opening ceremony is striving to be bigger and more extravagant than the last.  Hosts are unabashed at trying to have the fastest and most difficult tracks and courses ever.

But there is a balance to be struck.  Is faster necessarily better?  Is bigger always better?  Why is more always better?  What if better is being able to be human, make mistakes and know how to adeptly compensate or correct a mistake in mid-run?

If you have a sliding track that creates “G-forces that collapse the body, rendering it difficult to control the sled”, as the investigating committee have described the Whistler bobsled & luge runs, it becomes virtually impossible to correct those mistakes.  Is that really a better track?  Or with skiing, as Lindsay Vonn put it, on the track she skied when she almost broke her back (which was fashioned like the Whistler ones in order to prepare her… sprayed with water and frozen), ‘It was like pond ice’. A host of athletes have been injured in training runs prior to the games, and are now unable to compete.  More is not necessarily better.  We need to get at the root of what this is really all about…

My solution?  Only host Olympics in nations that have virtually no chance of making it onto the podium. A country that sends their best year after year with pride and a sense of excellence and bridge building would make a gracious host indeed.  Have every nation contribute funding, according to some financial formula, to pay for the expenses.

Make sure the climate is appropriate for the games whether summer or winter.  Have experienced international sports committees oversee the development and safety of the facilities.  Have a comment period from athletes, which is taken into account and then respected.  If the best lugers in the world dubbed the turn where the recent competitor died as “50-50” in terms of whether they would be able to stay on their sled, and another competitor said she felt like ‘a lemming’ and ‘crash test dummy’, then something is wrong and the athletes saw it very clearly.  Allow equal access to all competitors, both foreign and home-based, enough of this ‘aggressively protected home court advantage.’

Maybe the tragic loss of life that cast a dark shadow on this Olympics can be eventually looked at as the beginning of making the Olympics not just safer, but better.  That would be a wonderful way to remember and honor this athlete, and to honor all athletes.

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Preventing the Disease of Discouragement

Sunday, February 7th, 2010

Discourage:
1. To deprive of confidence, hope, or spirit.
2.
To hamper by discouraging; deter.
3.
To try to prevent by expressing disapproval or raising objections.

We all get hit by hard times or get hit hard sometimes.  Sometimes we are discouraged by our own spirit and thoughts.  Sometimes, it is by the world or by others.  The economy has left many discouraged, along with other feelings.  Family circumstances, work, relationships, parenting, our health, sometimes even just trying to find enough time in the day to get things accomplished.  I think the first definition is the most appropriate and allows us to spiral into a pit of discouragement and eventually despair.

What can you do to prevent the disease of discouragement?

Find ways to feel more in control.  Even if it seems insignificant. The human spirit uses this as food which grows exponentially, and that food nourishes and replenishes hope and confidence.  And with hope and confidence you can continue to move on.

  • Remind yourself daily of 3 things that are good about your life, and 3 things that are good about you.
  • Do something good for someone else every day….let them into traffic, let them go ahead of you in line at the store, buy them a cup of coffee, leave a tip, say something nice to a co-worker or the check-out person.  It doesn’t have to be big.  Over time you will feel better as you make positive change in the world…and you regain a sense of value and hope.
  • Or… do bigger things, such as: help someone else; work at a soup kitchen; donate to a charity; help someone at a store or at your school; help clean a community park with a local organization; make someone smile.  Doing these things plants seeds of hope and reaffirms your value and abilities and renews confidence.
  • Focus on what really matters
  • Watch this short video and know you are not alone and in good company.

“A problem is a chance for you to do your best.”   Duke Ellington

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”   Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.” The Dalai Lama

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Courtesy & Common Sense

Monday, February 1st, 2010


Last week I wrote about Haiti and our need to be shocked to get involved.  I began thinking about what it takes for Americans to get involved in general; to make a difference.  My son came home from school talking about a video clip he watched at school on ABC’s “What would you do?”  We like to think of ourselves as people who would help when needed.  But as this show so poignantly points out, in the moment, we don’t always act in the way we would ultimately like or in ways that really reflect our values. Unfortunately, we judge subconsciously more than we realize. Take a moment to watch the following video:

By reflecting us as we are rather than how we would like to be or to see ourselves, this video gives us a great opportunity…an opportunity to pause and think about our connectedness to one another and to be able to easily make more compassionate choices in our everyday encounters.  By doing that, it becomes automatic to lend a hand.  No need for the shock value.  When courtesy, compassion, awareness and caring of others well-being is not considered ‘a savior’ as mentioned in this story, but as everyday common sense and decency, all of our lives are enriched.

What if this were the fabric of our society?

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